Promesses et déceptions

La vie est pleine de promesses,
faites pour ne pas se faire réaliser.
Les déceptions sont reconnus car
elles sont comme le couché du soleil.

J'en veux plus de promesses et déceptions,
mon système n'en peut plus.
Les émotions bouleversées, mises à croire,
à espérer et empiétés dessus.

Lorsque ce serai mon tour, lors de mon besoin,
Seras-tu là? Oui? Oui.
c'est de la merde que tu me fais envaller,
Car c'est mon heure du besoin et je suis seule.

Les promesse emportent la déception
connue depuis longtemps.
Les promesses j'y croient plus et
je suis encore décue.

*1997*

The Vine and the Flower
Courtesy of Lise Lemay
Letellier, MB
2007

Exploration

Wondering through the depths of my soul
Figuring out emotions beyond control
Corruptions can be left behind
In a dark corner of my mind
Have no fear, enter with confidence
Unblinded light passes through this fence
Pounding wonderments are there to explore
From deep within this budding core
Amazement from newfound peace
Expected to rise in sweet release
Fascination examined in these eyes
Knowing there'll be some compromise
Inner feelings long suppressed
Trouble me no more in great success
Unfading smiles from here to there
Symbolic to those who care
Caress my soul and heart with simplicity
Displays compassion and deep sincerity
Eased soul, mind and body
Strength built in conscious dignity

*August 1997*

Inner Questionning

Where would my thoughts be
without concealed
emotions and feelings
to submit my inner peace and serenity
to someone, a complete stranger,
who will understand them?

A complete stranger...
it seems almost impossible to think of
the effort it would take to have someone
relish my thoughts and smile with
serene dignity and face my secrets.

The effort is somewhat anticipated
and conceivable to approve of such action
that is uncontrollably out of sync, out of sorts,
to the ideal of a person getting close,
reaching out to know the history of ones trepidations.

Such action would be misinterpreted
for a longing of wild sensations existing
between two chemically bound, ravishing
people who have long suppressed and
blocked out emotions related to touch.

Why suppress the need for touch
by an opposing view who can exude
such passion and leave me feeling
whole and wanted by another soul
exquisitely demonstrating coital enjoyment.

Thus comes conclusion of opposed views
and hardships suffered must surface
to honor courtship behaviors an salvage
my resolve to pursue further pleasures,
than only coital gestures, in affinity.

*July 1997*

Unresolved

When will it be my turn??
To love and be loved
To hold and be held
To comfort and be comforted

When will my time come??
To give and be received
To rejoyce and be accepted
To bear a child and be appreciated

When will my heart heal??
From sorrow and have happiness
From deceit and have trust
From lost love and gain wisdom

When will my soul rest??
From restlessness and have peace
From constraint and have freedom
From hopelessness and gain hope

When will my wounds be forgotten??
From pain to soothing
From anguish to conquered
From fear to victory

When will I suffer no longer??
In memories from the past
In punishment from guilt
In corruption from pressured innocence

When will I forgive myself??
For not being able to do anything
For not saying something
For not having the strength to put it behind me

When? When will I accept myself??
For what I've accomplished
For the strength and inner will to continue my journey
For who I am and for the wisdom acquired on the basis of past experiences

*June 1997*

Mon petit sourire

Mon petit amour plein de vie
Je t'embrasse quand tu souri
J'écoute ton petit coeur
Battant fort en espérant ton bonheur

Les larmes aux yeux y'en a plus
Sauf pour celles de joie
Tu t'excites et tu découvres
Des merveilles qui t'appatiennet

Dans mes bras tu t'sauveras
des gros monstres et fantomes
Y'en n'aura pas

Tes soucies et tes peines
J'l'ai prendrai de toi
En les fesant venir les miennes
Tu le saurais que c'est moi

Ferme tes petits yeux
C'est le temps du repos
Fait prière au cieux
Mon petit sourire fait dodo

*June 1997*

Class of 1997

Knowing faces and parts of their mind
Can we truly say we'll put this all behind?
Memories we've made plenty I'm sure
Now we must plan for our budding future
Words of wisdom, we've gained plenty
In saying nothing, we'll come out empty
Expanded minds we know not what's to come
Our life journey ended? No! It has just begun
We have grown and became one together
We will push on and make things better
Comparing ourselves to each other no longer it seems
The truth came out and we've made it as a team
Struggles? Yes, we have had many
Now with open eyes we begin to see
A few times we've all disagreed
Power struggles? No more! We've learned how to lead!
Just as we thought we've met our match
No-one is invincible and we've buried the hatch
Imprinted memories from how much we've grown
Shows us that no-one will be left alone
We've shared many obstacles and many things feared
Yet, we've overcome barriers when our minds have cleared
We've made it this far but it isn't the end
It is time to start living I encourage you my friends
Remember the good times and also the bad
For these are the precious moments we have had
Our greatness is achieved in self acceptance
But remember not to be greedy in times of indulgence
It is up to us now, the lessons we'll teach
To all the future's children we must try to reach
We came to this school mere girls and boys
Now we shall leave young adults with a certain poise
Plunge confident into the world and take a dive
Because we have the knowledge and we will survive
The memories made have become our own
Can't we see that we have grown
There will be many nights when we'll turn to go to sleep
And we'll reminisce the good times and we'll sometimes weep
Now, dry those eyes and shed no more tears
After all we still have our peers
A few last words that I am proud to say
Before we depart on our final day
We've made our mark, a little piece of heaven
Together we truly are the class of 1997

*May 1997*

J'm'aime

Je suis une personne valable. Je prends mes propres décisions. J'accepte la responsabilité de mes actes et les conséquences de mes décisions. Je prends ma place au soleil! Je respecte mes forces et mes faiblesses, et celles des autres. Je ne suis pas un problème. Tu n'es pas un problème. C'est la situation qui est le problème et nous allons la régler ensemble. Je suis capable de plus. Je prends des risques. J'accepte que je n'aimerai pas tout le monde. J'accepte que je ne plairerai pas à tout le monde. Je suis prête à changer si je voie la nécessité de changer. Je peux me changer; je ne peux pas changer l'autre. Je m'aime et je suis valable!

*1997*

Crying Release

I cry for hours at a time
Why?
I am not sure
Me emotions were so well kept,
locked inside not surfacing
But now...
I cry
Why do I cry?
I ask myself why?
The answer never comes.
Is it stress?
Perhaps
Is it love?
Maybe
Is it personal?
Definitely
Do you know why?
I haven't a clue
I cry and write to figure it out
But my train of thought is blocked right out.
I cry and cry
Not knowing why
My tears fall down in silent serenity
I am alone and I cry
Still I know not why
It comes out without warning
I cry alone in my corner unnoticed
Still I know not why I cry
As I sigh and breathe I cry with great ease.
Why do I cry?
I simply just need a release.

*April 1997*

What Am I?

I am not tall
Nor am I thin
I am short
With distinctive curves

I am not loud
Nor am I forward
I am quiet
With a sense of compassion

I am not weak
Nor am I strong
I am fearful
With a lack of trust

I am not sheltered
Nor am I protected
I am ashamed
With loss of self worth

I am not perfect
Nor am I brilliant
I am a woman
With self-discipline

I am not an animal
Nor am I an object
I am a person
With ideas that want to expand

*March 1997*

I Was Yours

When I looked into your eyes for the first time
They captured the essence of my heart and
I was yours.

*March 1997*