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Sunday, June 15, 2008

The Vine and the Flower
Courtesy of Lise Lemay
Letellier, MB


Wondering through the depths of my soul
Figuring out emotions beyond control
Corruptions can be left behind
In a dark corner of my mind
Have no fear, enter with confidence
Unblinded light passes through this fence
Pounding wonderments are there to explore
From deep within this budding core
Amazement from newfound peace
Expected to rise in sweet release
Fascination examined in these eyes
Knowing there'll be some compromise
Inner feelings long suppressed
Trouble me no more in great success
Unfading smiles from here to there
Symbolic to those who care
Caress my soul and heart with simplicity
Displays compassion and deep sincerity
Eased soul, mind and body
Strength built in conscious dignity

*August 1997*

Inner Questionning

Where would my thoughts be
without concealed
emotions and feelings
to submit my inner peace and serenity
to someone, a complete stranger,
who will understand them?

A complete stranger...
it seems almost impossible to think of
the effort it would take to have someone
relish my thoughts and smile with
serene dignity and face my secrets.

The effort is somewhat anticipated
and conceivable to approve of such action
that is uncontrollably out of sync, out of sorts,
to the ideal of a person getting close,
reaching out to know the history of ones trepidations.

Such action would be misinterpreted
for a longing of wild sensations existing
between two chemically bound, ravishing
people who have long suppressed and
blocked out emotions related to touch.

Why suppress the need for touch
by an opposing view who can exude
such passion and leave me feeling
whole and wanted by another soul
exquisitely demonstrating coital enjoyment.

Thus comes conclusion of opposed views
and hardships suffered must surface
to honor courtship behaviors an salvage
my resolve to pursue further pleasures,
than only coital gestures, in affinity.

*July 1997*


When will it be my turn??
To love and be loved
To hold and be held
To comfort and be comforted

When will my time come??
To give and be received
To rejoyce and be accepted
To bear a child and be appreciated

When will my heart heal??
From sorrow and have happiness
From deceit and have trust
From lost love and gain wisdom

When will my soul rest??
From restlessness and have peace
From constraint and have freedom
From hopelessness and gain hope

When will my wounds be forgotten??
From pain to soothing
From anguish to conquered
From fear to victory

When will I suffer no longer??
In memories from the past
In punishment from guilt
In corruption from pressured innocence

When will I forgive myself??
For not being able to do anything
For not saying something
For not having the strength to put it behind me

When? When will I accept myself??
For what I've accomplished
For the strength and inner will to continue my journey
For who I am and for the wisdom acquired on the basis of past experiences

*June 1997*

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Mon petit sourire

Mon petit amour plein de vie
Je t'embrasse quand tu souri
J'écoute ton petit coeur
Battant fort en espérant ton bonheur

Les larmes aux yeux y'en a plus
Sauf pour celles de joie
Tu t'excites et tu découvres
Des merveilles qui t'appatiennet

Dans mes bras tu t'sauveras
des gros monstres et fantomes
Y'en n'aura pas

Tes soucies et tes peines
J'l'ai prendrai de toi
En les fesant venir les miennes
Tu le saurais que c'est moi

Ferme tes petits yeux
C'est le temps du repos
Fait prière au cieux
Mon petit sourire fait dodo

*June 1997*

Class of 1997

Knowing faces and parts of their mind
Can we truly say we'll put this all behind?
Memories we've made plenty I'm sure
Now we must plan for our budding future
Words of wisdom, we've gained plenty
In saying nothing, we'll come out empty
Expanded minds we know not what's to come
Our life journey ended? No! It has just begun
We have grown and became one together
We will push on and make things better
Comparing ourselves to each other no longer it seems
The truth came out and we've made it as a team
Struggles? Yes, we have had many
Now with open eyes we begin to see
A few times we've all disagreed
Power struggles? No more! We've learned how to lead!
Just as we thought we've met our match
No-one is invincible and we've buried the hatch
Imprinted memories from how much we've grown
Shows us that no-one will be left alone
We've shared many obstacles and many things feared
Yet, we've overcome barriers when our minds have cleared
We've made it this far but it isn't the end
It is time to start living I encourage you my friends
Remember the good times and also the bad
For these are the precious moments we have had
Our greatness is achieved in self acceptance
But remember not to be greedy in times of indulgence
It is up to us now, the lessons we'll teach
To all the future's children we must try to reach
We came to this school mere girls and boys
Now we shall leave young adults with a certain poise
Plunge confident into the world and take a dive
Because we have the knowledge and we will survive
The memories made have become our own
Can't we see that we have grown
There will be many nights when we'll turn to go to sleep
And we'll reminisce the good times and we'll sometimes weep
Now, dry those eyes and shed no more tears
After all we still have our peers
A few last words that I am proud to say
Before we depart on our final day
We've made our mark, a little piece of heaven
Together we truly are the class of 1997

*May 1997*


Je suis une personne valable. Je prends mes propres décisions. J'accepte la responsabilité de mes actes et les conséquences de mes décisions. Je prends ma place au soleil! Je respecte mes forces et mes faiblesses, et celles des autres. Je ne suis pas un problème. Tu n'es pas un problème. C'est la situation qui est le problème et nous allons la régler ensemble. Je suis capable de plus. Je prends des risques. J'accepte que je n'aimerai pas tout le monde. J'accepte que je ne plairerai pas à tout le monde. Je suis prête à changer si je voie la nécessité de changer. Je peux me changer; je ne peux pas changer l'autre. Je m'aime et je suis valable!


Crying Release

I cry for hours at a time
I am not sure
Me emotions were so well kept,
locked inside not surfacing
But now...
I cry
Why do I cry?
I ask myself why?
The answer never comes.
Is it stress?
Is it love?
Is it personal?
Do you know why?
I haven't a clue
I cry and write to figure it out
But my train of thought is blocked right out.
I cry and cry
Not knowing why
My tears fall down in silent serenity
I am alone and I cry
Still I know not why
It comes out without warning
I cry alone in my corner unnoticed
Still I know not why I cry
As I sigh and breathe I cry with great ease.
Why do I cry?
I simply just need a release.

*April 1997*

Friday, June 13, 2008

What Am I?

I am not tall
Nor am I thin
I am short
With distinctive curves

I am not loud
Nor am I forward
I am quiet
With a sense of compassion

I am not weak
Nor am I strong
I am fearful
With a lack of trust

I am not sheltered
Nor am I protected
I am ashamed
With loss of self worth

I am not perfect
Nor am I brilliant
I am a woman
With self-discipline

I am not an animal
Nor am I an object
I am a person
With ideas that want to expand

*March 1997*

I Was Yours

When I looked into your eyes for the first time
They captured the essence of my heart and
I was yours.

*March 1997*


If I had but one dream
It would be to be with you
If it takes me a lifetime
To have your smile before mine
I would wait for another chance
Just to see your charming glance

If it means to be with you
I'll wait a million years too
If those who fear your success
As no-one has your awareness
I would wait for another chance
Just to see your charming glance

*March 1997*

Like a Fence

"Love is like a fence,
It holds the ones you love,
It shields you from harm,
And it has little pricks that
Drive you insane!"

*February 1997*
Spring Has Sprung
Smithers BC
April 2008

Gardez en mémoire

Malcomprise elle s'enferme
Elle ressent beaucoup de peine.
Ses yeux remplissent de larmes
Elle ne veut plus garder son calme.
Ses amis reconnaissent sa tristesse
Et lui offrent leurs tendressent.
Comprenant que ses amis
Sont sincèrent, tout est compris.
Important sont ses mémoires
Il en faut qu'un peu pour y croire.
Le silence est impuissant en amitié
Toujours les histoires s'écroulent sans penser.
Impressions qui restent avec nous pour toujours
L'habileté de poursuivre nos rêves qui cours.
A travers des temps on se rapelle
Nos expériences qui sont nouvelles.
Toutes choses portant attention
Tout en regardant les expressions.
Nos amitiés dureront pour une éternité
En mémoires on doit les garder.

*février 1997*

Mon silence, un regard

Mon silence n'est qu'un regard
dans la noirceur, sombre et incompréhensible
Sans raisons, personne n'a le courage
de distinguer ses propres fautes, interprète
Des choix, j'en ai plus toujours
l'éternité n'est qu'une retraite de la réalité
Quelques pensés sont sans émotions
incomparables aux tragédies soufertes, injustes
Les corridors, longs et étroits continuent
sans fin, sans passage à l'extérieur
Toutes impressions, ne restent que parfois
et ils sont distinct du jour au lendemain
Observations, fortes et en mémoire
tant de misère dans nos vies, irréelles
Mon silence n'est qu'un regard
dans la noirceur, sombre et incompréhensible

*février 1997*

Left Me Nothing

You told me you'd always be there
When I'm in need
Now it seems you just don't care
And you've left me to bleed

Caring not in my time of sorrow
Were you really my friend?
Hoping we'd talk you'd say tomorrow
Now I think this is the end

My feelings just don't count anymore
Except when you want something
You've shut me out and slammed the door
Without respect or gratitude you've left me nothing

*February 1997*

Stood Up

Stood up, he stands out above all the rest.
Stood up, I shan't be budged from my perception.
Stood up, he speaks out against all who oppose him.
Stood up, I'm denied my true feelings of thought.
Stood up, he plays and smile and draws me in.
Stood up, I regret and weep and want him more.
Stood up, he overpowers my sensations and laughs.
Stood up, I curse in wallowed emotions of untamed convictions.
Stood up, he knows not nor does he seem to care.
Stood up, I crave his affection in anger and in hope...
Stood up, I'll never forget the feelings inside.
Stood up, forgettably unforgiving.

*January 1997*

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Aimer en attentente

Désappointée, je me retourne et je pleure
Je l'aime, oui le sais
Je suis prête, je la'ttends
Il ne peut pas me recevoir
Mais, je le veux, pour qui il est
Personne ne comprends
Je suis folle, folle pour cet homme
Et pourquoi?
Je ne comprends pas, je suis attachée
J'ai besoin de me ressentir aimée

*Janvier 1997*

You're My Only

Honey you're my only
Honey you're my only

Baby don't let me go
Baby cause I love you so
Baby you're my only
Honey you're my only

Baby I'll never let you go
Cause baby I love you so
Tell me that you love me too
Tell me that your heart is true

Baby you're my only
Honey you're my only

Baby I won't let you
Tell me it ain't true
I love you so
Baby I can't let go

Honey you're my only
Baby I love you
You're my only

Keep your promises
And I won't be afraid
The kisses that I gave you
Is a symbol that I love you

Baby you're my only
Honey you're my only
Baby you're my only
Honey how can this be
Baby you're my only
Honey you're my...

*December 1996*

Set Aside

Feeling alone and set aside
Nowhere to go, no place to hide
Anger dominates my fear
Lonely and unwanted is what I hear
Smiles cover up my frown
Sadness kicks me when I'm down
Everything will be alright
Gotta stay and put up a fight
Shame something that is well known
Builds up and stays until it's shown
Tears filling in my eyes
My pain can't be measured in size
Heartbroken I run to forget
Nothing can ever make me upset
Lies I took and I now believe
Can't be set straight when I grieve
Feeling alone and set aside
Nowhere to go, no place to hide

*December 1996*

Je serai libre!

Si j'avais le courage de te dire ce que je pense.
Je serai libre... Je serai libre!
Le courage m'esquisse par chance et
je ne puisse pas te le dire.
Même si ma volonté t'appelle,
je ne suis pas capable de penser.
Sans toi puis-je vivre?
Vivre sans toi? Non! Jamais!
Pourais-je avoir ton silence,
sans geste de beauté?
Une foie plus tu m'appelles et
je viens dans tes bras.
Sans questions, sans demandes;
tu me prends et je suis à toi.
Non pas une possession mais
plutot une acolade d'amour.
Le courage ça vient d'en dedans
et ce n'est pas toujours évident qu'il est là.
Mais, c'est ce qui me pousse dans ta direction;
ça m'encourage d'avantage à poursuivre
mes rêves et mes ambitions.
Un jour... Un jour la chance de te les dires.
Tu en seras le premier à les entendre.
Et, finalementje serai libre!
Si javais le courage de te dire....
Si javais le courage...
Je serai libre!

Not Knowing

Gentle as a lamb
Free as a bird
People fearing what can
And not hearing a word

Supple as a fish
Green as a leaf
People thinking of wish
And not knowing to believe

*October 1996*

Monday, June 9, 2008

Salmon Arm, BC
May 2008

"Once you understand the silence that ties me to the reality of thought, you can understand the words that I try to interpret from it."

*October 1996*

Anything For Me

My baby would do anything for me
Treated me well, some kind of royalty
Until the day he left without saying goodbye
I told myself never again will I cry

One day I awoke all alone
No-one to call my very own
Seems like yesterday I was in your arms
Laying beside your undeserving charms

My baby would do anything for me
Treated me well, some kind of royalty
Until the day he left without saying goodbye
I told myself never again will I cry

Creeping up from the depths of my soul
I can't keep my self control
I want to shout and tell you to stay
Why did you have to go away

My baby would do anything for me
Treated me well, some kind of royalty
Until the day he left without saying goodbye
I told myself never again will I cry

When I'd get home from work
I felt all alone
Couldn't sleep one wink at night
Don't know what went wrong

My baby would do anything for me
Treated me well, some kind of royalty
Until the day he left without saying goodbye
I told myself never again will I cry

*October 1996*

Mon petit chéri

Mon petit chéri
Qui cligne son oeil et sourit
Semble si gentil
Avec ses dents blanches qui brillent

Son petit humour
Qui fait rire pour des jours
Semble prendre mon silence
Avec un surplus d'une chance

Mon petit toutous
Qui caresse d'un touché doux
Semble savoir le comfort
Avec le chaleureux qui ressort

Son petit coeur
Qui bat fort sans peur
Semble généreux
Avec la tendresse qui est en feu

Mon petit chéri d'amour
Qui restera j'espère pour toujours
Semble si chouette
Avec son sourire, ses yeux bleux me respectent

*Septembre 1996*


I've been down this road
Many times
Thinking will this hurt subside
With time
I can't sleep and can
Hardly eat
When will this pain
Admit defeat
Nothing seems right in this
Heart of mine
When will this pain
Admit defeat

*September 1996*


Torn between the both of them
Caught without knowing the truth
True emotions not wanting to show
Disappointment, sorrow and disbelief
Trust that people shall seek
Understanding not what happens
Tragedy strikes without warning
Conflicting in all discomfort
Understatements of past lies
Confrontations of much awkwardness

*September 1996*


Someone I keep close to my heart
Is dear to me
Hoping to stay close not to part
Dreams that will be

Someone I can cry or laugh to
Makes me smile
Hoping you know without a clue
Happiness for a while

Someone who comforts with hugged embrace
With an open arm
Hoping not to lose the gift of grace
He'll keep me from harm

Someone who enjoys fine company
Awakens his mind
Hoping to keep his honest dignity
Knowing to be kind

Someone is this little man
Who is a real sweetie
Hoping that it still means you can
As you are my little cutie

*September 1996*


Daniel, Daniel, Daniel tu es un bon ami
Il y a aucun mot qui te décrit
Sans le savoir tu es un vrai défit
Daniel, Daniel, Daniel les yeux bleux qui ressort
Les filles qui te parcourent te disent; "je t'adore!"
Car mon ami Daniel vaut plus que de l'or

*septembre 1996*


Hands surrounding the throat
Anger is what possesses this action
My life flashing, I think I'm gonna croak
Permanently damaging there is no resolution
Air cut off there's no more breath
Sensations lost it can't be much longer
If my life is useless this should be my death
Privacy? Mine no longer! This means I'm a gonner

*August 1996*

To Feel

Wanting to hold someone so close to me
Is a wish I've wanted to hear this sincerity
The need for closeness is always on my mind
My true feelings for him can never be left behind
A touch resulting in soothing relief
Is a sign of my loosened grief
Fingers running through my hair
Shows me he isn't afraid to care
Pressed closely to feel his heartbeat next to mine
Beating as one, it sends shivers down my spine
Wanting to hold someone so close to me
Never letting go to feel this passion and sincerity

*August 1996*


Torn between two and one
Is life so full beyond no-one
Torn between one and two
Knowing not what to do

*August 1996*

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Before the Manitoba Border
April 2008

Searching to Find

Searching to find one
I can call my own
Isn't a task quite as simple
As wounds permanently sewn

Searching to find one
I can call my mate
Isn't a task quite as simple
As tears shed by a date

Searching to find one
I can all my pet
Isn't a task quite as simple
As denied love that we fret

Searching to find one
I can call my sweet
Isn't a task quite as simple
As meetings made so discreet

Searching to find one
I can call my soul
Isn't a task quite as simple
As hearts broken beyond control

Searching to find one
Who is truly mine
Isn't a task simply because
Things come to those in time

*August 1996*

Lost Loves

Feeling your heartbeat close to mine
Makes me wish it could last
Running your fingers through my hair
Sends shivers down my spine
Surrounding grips gave away the past
Lost loves who prevent me to care

*August 1996*

Down N Out

When you're feeling down n out
Its no wonder you frown n pout
Wandering through life without a doubt
Makes you want to scream n shout

Concern means nothing in this war
It's no wonder you've left n slammed the door
Leaving me no more choice, I'm poor
Without your love I'm nothing except sore

*August 1996*

Couldn't Share

If I felt the way I did
I couldn't help it yet, I hid
Burning desires that were there
Couldn't show it, couldn't care
My fears they were very real
Couldn't share with him my ordeal
Getting close my nerves were gone
Couldn't know all I've seen since dawn
Commitment a forbidden word to this man
Couldn't stay with one faithful woman
My fears they were very real
Couldn't share with him my ordeal

*August 1996*

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Toujours là

Une distance les sépare du temps
Ce n'est rien à eux en ces moments.
Conquérir leur amour reste fort
Dominant jusqu'à la veillée est tard.
Ayant confiance leurs forces sont bien
Diminuant Non! même s'ils ont rien.
La solitude ils en connaissent pas
Car ils se tiennent et seront tourjours là.

*aout 1996*

Unable to

Unable to sleep
I turn to weep
Past events.
Unable to cry
I turn and sigh
Past love.
Unable to grieve
I turn to leave
Past memories.
Unable to talk
I turn and walk
Past angers.
Unable to sleep,
Cry, grieve or talk
I turn to weep,
Sigh, leave and walk
Past events, loves,
Memories and angers.
I'm unable to deal
With all life's dangers.
I'm unable to...
Unable to...

*July 1996*

These Are

These are my eyes
when they are blue
They seem so sad
when I'm not with you

These are my lips
when they smile bright
They seem so happy
when I feel alright

These are my cheeks
when they are rosy
They seem to glow
when I feel cozy

These are my hands
when they are warm
They seemed so soft
when I was born

This is my heart
when it is giving
It seems to pound
when I am loving

*July 1996*

Chaque battement

Chaque battement de coeur franchit
Ne cessera autant qu'un amour est établit
Mais seul cet amour puisse saisir
Un esprit qui cherche à s'égrandir

Chaque battement de coeur involontaire
Ne s'éteindra lorsque tout sera clair
Mais seul, il n'y sera point
Un chuchot du jour au lendemain

Chaque battement de coeur résonnat
Ne s'expose que par l'absence du temps
Mais seul le temps n'existe plus
Un geste sincère s'est apperçu

Chaque battement de coeur complet
Ne s'échappera d'un bon secret
Mais seul ce secret est entre deux
Un héro enchanté dans ses yeux

Chaque battement de coeur franchit
Ne cessera autant qu'un amour est établit
Mais seul cet amour puisse saisir
Un esprit qui cherche à s'égrandir

*juillet 1996*

Turned Out Sad

Thoughts re-entering my mind

Past events that were left behind
Confusions taken for granted
Knowing not why I'm haunted

Gathering notions that seem true
Comparing them without a clue
Nothing ever looked so bad
Ashamed feelings turned out sad

*July 1996*

Lorsque je me regarde

Chaque soir lorsque je me regarde
dans le miroir, je pense: Pourquoi
ai-je la'ir de telle façon? Sans
réplique, je connais la réponse.
Mais, sans l'savoir je me tourmente
à l'intérieur car avec mon apparence
je me sent inférieur. Tous les
jours je me voie et j'oublie toutes
les choses aimés aussi. Même les
gestes d'amitié envers moi sont
que des farces tourmentés.

*juillet 1996*

The Storm

Winds picking up, a sure sign
Another Storm is coming near.
Coming with a warning, knowing
Better take cover soon.
Cover is worse when seen, but
Flying open with rage.
Rage is this storm that continues, endless
Beating down on the lone house.
The house takes the storm, and
Stands strong not crumbling down.
Crumbling down seems easier now, instead
It stands still taking the storm.
The storm leaves just as it came, yet
Hope will arise from strength within.

*June 1996*

Friday, June 6, 2008

You Think You Can/Are

You think you can have what you let go.
The truth is you didn't have a clue and
Now you know.

You think you are the greatest or the best.
The truth is you have the biggest ego and
Now you're the same as the rest.

You think you can take what isn't yours.
The truth is you didn't know what you wanted and
Now all you have left is hours.

You think you can treat people like objects.
The truth is you have an illusion and
Now you've nothing 'cept rejections.

You think you are everyone's hero.
The truth is your fate is spoken for and
Now you can't grasp things of tomorrow.

*June 1996*

Par chance

Si j'avais eu le choix de différencier
les doutes de ma vie.
Tout semblerait insusceptible, intouchable
pour retourner à ces soucies.
Mais, de retourner sur ces décisions
serait de douter mon existence.
Mes convictions ne seraient mises en questions
et d'après tout, ce n'est que par chance.

*mai 1996*

Springtime Ride
Lockport MB
April 2008

Mon silence, un regard

Mon silence n'est qu'un regard
dans la noirceur, sombre et incompréhensible.
Sans raisons, personne n'a le courage
de distinguer ses propres fautes, interprète.
Des choix, j'en ai plus toujours
l'éternité n'est qu'une retraite de réalité.
Quelques pensés sont sans émotions
incomparables aux tragédies souffertes, injustes.
Les corridors, longs et étroits continuent
sans fin, sans passage à l'extérieur.
Toutes impressions, ne restent que parfois
et ils sont distinct du jour au lendemain.
observations, fortes et en mémoire
tant de misère dans nos vies, irréelles.
Mon silence n'est qu'un regard
dans la noirceur, sombre et imcompréhensible


Life is over as I knew it
Nothing will ever be the same
The walls are getting closer
Closing in, not to be tame
All is lost in the present
Life can be forgiven
Mistakes brought such sorrow
Never to be forgotten

*May 1996*